Thursday, January 28, 2016

Why I Will Always Be a Cratchit...

Or I would totally be a reformed Scrooge if I ever had the money!

(Yes I realize that Christmas is over! Haha!)

I have had an extremely rough week and I'm not sure it's going to be better next week either.  I have been dealing with a cold thing that in turn triggers my MS symptoms.  Papa and I have been dealing with issues with Guppy 1's teachers.  And I have been thinking a lot about what happened this week on my blog....

Which has turned out to be a really good thing actually!

All the comments (including those not posted and the words of trolls) had me really doing some soul searching....

I'm not a confident person.  And, up until now, I have always had a "thin skin".

I have done some really growing in the last few days.

And, crazy as it is for me to say this...

There are things about me which make me truly happy.  So weird to say that after all this time on Earth!  One of the biggest things I am happy with is...

I am a very generous person....Some would say "to a fault".  Funny thing is I don't take that to be derogatory.  

Being generous is something programmed into my DNA, I swear to God.  I always tell everyone that I may have grown up "spoiled" but not a "spoiled brat".  Once I realized the "truth" about Santa, I asked for mostly cash for Christmas so I could buy gifts for my friends, family, and people who needed them.  While in college, I would use some of my monthly allowance to routinely buy extra groceries for my roommates, Papa, and his roommates.  My 21st birthday present from my parents was a weekend trip to NYC that I catered around things I knew Papa would love to do. (By the way, that was an amazing weekend and I enjoyed all the things we did too.)  When Papa & I were newly married and didn't have kids, we would donate tons of Christmas presents to needy children.  I remember one year I learned about a single mom with a daughter  who was having a lot of financial issues.  Papa and I took care of their entire Christmas that year.

It's not all about money either.  We have made our house a "safe" place for our children's friends to come and be themselves.  Guppy 1 has had friends with serious emotional issues (mostly anxiety related) that would come here to talk and relax.  We are part of a music community that consider us their "Second Mom & Dad" - which is something we cherish more than I can ever put into words.  Guppy 2's friends love being here because we let them be loud and laugh and be regular thirteen year old kids.

And, it translates to what we do for our Guppies too.  Papa and I will often do without something we wanted or needed to make sure G1 & G2's needs/wants are met - not all the "wants" of course, but ones we find important/enriching too.  We have invested countless hours (through our words and actions) to demonstrate how generosity can enhance your life and those around you.

Why am I rambling on about this?

Because I am a giver.  I actually LIKE that about myself.  And, it's not something I would ever in a million years (or for a million dollars) change about myself.

Does that take away from our financial health?  Yup, I am sure that it does. 

Can I find ways to balance out my giving spirit with saving money too?  Absolutely!  Can I do that without feeling guilty?  Probably not!  (Case in point...hiding snacks/drinks from G2's friends this week!  Haha)

Anyway, I really hope you will all continue reading my little blog and following my journey!

I'm going to continue finding ways to be frugal!  But, I'm going to do it in ways that work for the unique needs of my family and who I am at heart.

Happy Thursday!

P.S.  I have my Freebies post ready to go for tomorrow and I may (or may not) take this weekend off from blogging.  Either way, I will definitely be back to posting by Monday with my grocery totals for the month!


  1. Replies
    1. Thank you! I am pretty sure I have found my "silver lining" in the chaos of the last few days! =)

  2. Obviously I need to catch up on things but I am sorry if you have had some horrible comments!!! YUCK!! I had one in person the other day that had me near tears as I was repeating it to my husband. One of the ladies I work with sad that she doesn't skimp on food because her husband likes good food.... I bit my tongue and called my husband after work and asked him if I am serving him dog food! I get very irritated because people judge others intentions and want to make people feel bad just so that they feel better. Hope you are feeling better!!

    1. Thanks. And yes, I am feeling better. I'm actually in a good place, believe it or not. Papa's unemployment has had its ups and downs but we are going to get through this. And I am going to do it with my integrity, values, and personality intact! LOL
      It's horrible that happened to you! And I am sure that you do NOT feed your husband "dog food"! =) As I said in an earlier post, I do make special accommodations for G1 due to her past issue and our desire to keep her at a healthy weight - especially as she finishes the (EXTRA) stressful year and a half of high school. But I am not one to criticize anyone else for their choices/decisions. We all have to decide what's best for our own families!
      Thanks for sticking around! =)

  3. Hi TraceyBee. I know that my opinion really does not bear much weight but I wanted you to know that one of the things that draws me to your blog is your character. You remind me of someone in my life who was, and always will be, dear to me. You have a very giving nature and you always put others before yourself. Your loving care of those near and dear to you is beautiful. You are one of those people who rarely come along in life that, even when there is not much left to give, you find a way to still give of yourself. That is nothing to be ashamed of or to apologize for. I'm sure that all or most of the comments left on your blog were probably done out of care and concern for your welfare and your family. I'm sorry if you were hurt by things that others said. I have had comments like that left on my blog too.
    I have a few dear friends who suffer with MS and it is also in my immediate family. I know the effects it can have on one's body and I admire how you take care of your family and your home, despite what you may deal with in your health condition.
    Your family is very blessed to be cared for by you and I'm sure they appreciate all that is done for them.
    Life is a full learning experience, isn't it?! You live and you learn, as my grandmother always told me. :)
    I'm glad you are staying positive and I am very glad I found your blog.
    Hugs and Prayers from me to you! :)

    1. Dawn, thank you so much for your kind words and prayers! I do appreciate it more than you know! But, honestly, I don't feel what I do is all that rare since it's simply who I am and always have been. I feel like it's as ingrained in me as something like the color of my eyes or being left handed. It just "is".

      The comments that I chose not to publish were mostly of the rude "troll" kind and I truly feel were left to cause controversy or to generate more traffic to their own blogs...well the ones that weren't "anonymous". Anyone who posted something that I felt could be given the benefit of the doubt (even if I didn't agree with what was said or the way it was said) was published.

      Anyway, I'm actually done with all of the worrying about it. I don't have enough room in my life for negativity. And I am ready to move on.

      Besides, something really great has come out of this...I am so much more secure with the person that I am -faults and all. So, in a strange way, I am kind of grateful that all this happened.

      I'm so sorry that you know so many people afflicted with MS. You probably also see how different the disease can progress from person to person. I have been on the luckier end of the spectrum and am thankful for that every single day...

      Thank you for reading my little blog too. It's awesome to know there are people out there who read it and care. I don't know what is going to happen in the future but I'm hoping for the best! =)